I wonder if other parents feel the same way...
My two boys are about to embark on their 1st and 4th birthdays. It feels like life happens so much faster when you have kids. I'm floored that my 3 year old is almost 4. It's like just yesterday I was 82 lbs heavier pregnant unable to wait any longer for this baby to leave my body and wondering if I'd ever get my body back. When he started crawling, when he started walking, when we rushed to the hospital for this or that, when he said his first words, etc.-where does the time go??!!
With my son Venice, and I gained 67 lbs and thought the same thing about my body...
I did work my butt off at the gym with diet and gym for both and did, infact, get "myself" back but with Venice, it JUST happened after 1 whole year. It was much harder the second time. A ton of other mothers told me that'd be the case.
Most importantly, I am so exhausted daily caring for two little ones and trying to stay focused on my work and always, always being driven. I try my hardest to not make any short cuts when it comes to their meals and diet and I try whole-heartedly to do everything we as mothers think we need to do daily: read to them, play with them, love them, talk to them about life and lessons, compassion, working hard, everything. At the end of each day, I am flipping exhausted. As much as I'm floored to see they are growing so fast which makes me so proud they are healthy and happy and, I think, am raising contributing empathetic little people, I can't help but think how hard this truly is. People have no IDEA. Most of my friends have no kids- which is very hard for me. Some nights I wish when they are/were babies that they would just grow faster because being scared and always on edge worried about everything is exhausting. Stressed about everything. Our parental minds don't stop. Ever.
I sit here now thinking....even in my most exhausted state[s], instead of feeling bad that I sometimes have wished they would just grow up so I can sleep soundly for possibly a whole 8 hrs straight that it's ok, you know? I shouldn't feel bad about my thoughts. I am only human too. I am truly doing my best everyday. I look at them. I see them in all their innocence and see that we as a family are so lucky to have health and consistency daily. With Irma and all the natural disasters happening right now I am so very thankful for the NOW. Sometimes as parents we have to try to look at our own lives from the outside through the glass and just feel so appreciative that we are alive and have love in our hearts for one another. Home is with one another. I'm sure all of us mothers have felt the same way. Just letting you all know you aren't alone.
Cheers to family, wacko kiddos, and delicious babies!
cheers you guys